My daughter

She's been showing up next to me for years. Sitting in the car seat next to me, chit chatting away. Or washing dishes with me. Or there when I'm walking down the street. When I first met Shanon I told him that she would be on her way soon and he was okay with it. He said he could see himself having a daughter. If he had said no, I wouldn't have moved in with him.

Earlier this week I went outside and told her she couldn't come. Explained how hard it is in this world and honestly I didn't want to raise her in that environment. Constant construction, constant drinking, fluctuating energy fields. Nope, she wasn't coming. I mourned and cried myself to sleep. 

The next day my sister called. She said she had a dream that night and she was pushing my daughter in a stroller and she was asking about me. Then, my neighbor came down and told me she had a dream about my daughter last night and wanted to know when she was going to get to be here. 

I guess I'm having a daughter. She's just as relentless as I am.