Wednesday, August 16, 2017

New Earth FAST Approaching

I feel like I'm a confetti toy being pulled from both ends and about ready to burst through. We leave for Mount Shasta tomorrow. Camping at Antlers campground. I will keep you posted.


Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Colton's 20th Birth Story

What in the WHAT?!

My little boy turned 20 at 7:08 MST this morning! I can't believe it. He is so magical - beyond anything that he even realizes. My master manifestor child.

Last week he called me really upset about his current situation, asking that I buy him a house that he can live in and pay the mortgage, but it would still be my house. I'm like, no. The next house I buy it's going to actually be my house. I'll do what I can, but I know I can't bail him out in the way that he was asking. The system is not established in a way that supports our highest good or even minimum needs. This is why we must be vigilant in our watching our thoughts, feelings and actions each second to connect with the highest timeline available at any given moment.

How I am able to assist is energetically via quantum physics, sacred geometries, unconditional love, clearing karmic contracts, dark energies etc. I've been doing this all through the weekend.

This morning was a special session. I sat on the floor and as a healing gift for both he and I, did my work. I pulled up the day we went to the hospital 20 years ago and could see all the trauma surrounding his birth and delivery.  Without going into details, because that's a story I requested be re-written, I asked that we both be gifted with a higher perspective of the events surrounding his birth. I asked that all trauma be healed, all stories be broadcast and viewed from a higher perspective. And so, it began.

As I watched the doctor come into my room, I asked that he and my mom be connected to source and grounded into the earth, filling up with both energies. I watched as the discordant energies and demonic forces that were surrounding my doctor that day be bound, transformed and reconnected back to the creator.

Moments later, I watched as I was wheeled into the operating room. Angels surrounding Colton and I, the nurses and doctor. High beings coached the doctor in precision cutting open of my womb, with loving kindness and an open heart.

I was guided back to my body in this here and now and felt movement in my uterus and the pain that I've carried there all these 20 years. A surrendering took place as I felt the pain reach up to the creator and reconnect with the center of all that is.

Back in the operating room my body and baby are transforming.  I watched as my baby filled up with creator energy unconditional love and light as he transitioned out of the comfortable energy of his mothers womb and into the bright lights of the earth dimension. When the doctor announces to the room "It's a boy" my eyes filled with happy excited joyous tears and my heart felt immense love immediately.

From above the room I watch all the nurses carefully and gently holding my baby boy and seeing to it that he was safe and loved. I see his fathers peaceful and gentle eyes watching everything and holding my hand through it all. I watch as his angels too bring him comfort and his body fills up with Christ light and energy guiding him in being the man that he is still in the process of becoming.

I watch as unconditional love, protection, and angelic beings fill the parts of me that are scared and terrified of what was happening as the doctor continues to stitch up my open body.

I watch as my baby boys angels continue to watch over him filling him with creator energy and surrounding him with protection. Ensuring that all who handle him handle him with care and grace as they placed him in his fathers arms for the first time.

The flower of life fills the room connecting each and every being in the room and a golden pink light fills every corner of the flower of every being physical and not.

This was a wonderful, joyful, peaceful experience for all of us.

As my baby boy is placed in my arms a calmness beyond anything I've ever felt fills the entire room. He looks up at me and I swear I see him smile. I am here he whispers to me through his energy body. I am here. Are you ready for this mom? Just wait to see what our future lays out for us. Just wait for the next twenty years. Just wait for the next forty. We are here, finally in human form as mutli -dimensional beings.

And so, the process begins of remembering who we truly are.

Thank you thank you thank you. It is so. It is now.

Monday, July 24, 2017

Family Time

I wanted to quickly share some pictures of my summertime adventures with family.

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Solstice Grid Work + Camping with my star family

Hello hello hello! And welcome through the doorway and into the eclipse energies fast approaching on August 21st.

Last week we escaped into the undisturbed energies of Limekiln State Park where no electromagnetic waves are allowed.

The night of solstice, the kids and I performed grid work at the beach there. We brought with us stones we had selected and worked with beforehand. Ashton buried his in the sands. Bailey gave hers to a group of girls camping there - explaining that it was intended to connect with the grid above and below. My stone found it's way into the creek after playing with me throughout the week.

Bailey demonstrating a treasure from the seas as a crown.

I had a wonderful time with Seth. It's been a long time since I've been camping with another adult who is so helpful. Here we all are hiking out of the LimeKilns.

After Limekiln, we headed 5 hours south to meet up with Colton, Nikki & their friend Brad who just happened to be there for a Vidcon convention. Always perfect timing.

I also got to meet Seth's sister, Annette, who was adopted at birth and who found her long lost family only 2 years ago.

Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, people standing, kitchen and indoor
She looks just like Seth's sister, Ally, who we stayed with that night. I didn't get a pic though:(

Here we are at Venice Beach. It was soooo much fun getting thrashed by the waves at this Beach. I'm soaking wet here and out of breath but I think it looks pretty good on me.

Seth's daughter, Madison, had surgery on Monday following our return. It has brought up so many emotions for me that I am trying to process. He wanted me to touch and get close to her and it's hard. She has no consciousness of me - it does not matter to her that I am there - there is no quality of life there. It's really really hard for me to accept and part of me is so angry about it and I think I always will be.

I realize now why Seth rarely wants to make love with me. It is breaking my heart and I cry when I think about it. I try to keep myself busy with work and look at the upset when I can. Really really really trying to ground it into the earth and connect to source when I do look at it. I can feel that I block the light around this issue. It feels like a bubble around us. I know I can get through it, and I don't want to involve Seth with it. He's already been through so much.

I need to figure out how to move through not having sex with a man that I'm in love with. How do you do that? How does that work? I'm asking the highest vibrational beings to guide me through this as I connect more fully with my very own highest vibrational frequency. I love you, Nicole. I know it's hard. I know how hard it is for you. It is not what it appears. You are in full complete union at the highest vibration. Know this. And Connect.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Mothers Day Gift & Power of Thoughts

Sunday was Mothers Day. I had such a hard time that day. Being away from Colton and Alex is not easy when it's the 'celebration of moms' day. What kind of mom abandons their own children to take care of someone else's child who is often too busy working or sleeping to be with you?

I will tell you who....

It's someone who has this vision in her head of the way she sees her true self. She is constantly laughing, voluptuous, abundant in every area of her life. Enjoying every second. It's HER that keeps the fire under my ass, who is determined to show her children that life is soooo much more than what we are conditioned,or born into, "believing" life is.

I found this letter from Bailey yesterday on the passenger seat next to me. Bailey had given it to me on Friday but I was driving and couldn't read it. Somehow it came back to me right at the perfect moment when I needed it the most.

This is the best mothers day present I've ever received. Yes, I will always be there to support all goals that my children have. She needed $0.10 to reach her goal of $100. Such an accomplishment - I'll give her the extra .1% that she needs to reach that goal. Hell YES I will!

And YES ~ thoughts are extremely powerful. "We created a house on a hill, by a creek, with gorgeous views, two stories, and huge windows - with our MINDS!"

The truth is....
Thoughts become Feelings
Feelings become Words
Words become Action
Action becomes Habit
Habit becomes your Reality

Even though I do teach my children this, and I know how TRUE this is, it's still so easy to forget to practice this in every single moment. Thoughts are so flittery fluttery. If I could only master this one aspect of the human experience, it would (aka WILL) be amazing.

Alright, I'm not there quite yet. But bring it on 3D.

Sunday, April 9, 2017

We have aligned with our Home - and Mercury Retrograde begins

In yesterdays post I made mention that we found it. It ticks all the boxes + a community pool.

The day before we found it - when I looked to see if there were any blocks - everything looked perfectly clear. Between Seth and I, the house, and the kids - all clear and it felt like life and color had entered the party.

The morning we found out, Wednesday 4/5, the realtor texted Seth some questions about his credit and then congratulated him on saving a family and their pets from a burning house in 2002.

I remember Seth coming over to my house that day in 2002 when I lived at 1407 boulevard way in Walnut Creek. I totally didn't believe him and laughed at him. Who knew that day 15 years ago would come back to us now. Of course it did.

We are total magic bunnies together. Like I said, when we are on - it's game freaking on.

It was either, we get our home - or - I go to Spain for a blueprint activation on May 6th.

I explained that Mercury retrograde begins April 9th (today) and that no new contracts until it ends on May 3rd.

I knew that I can participate in the blueprint activation from here - but ONLY if we had space to do it (which living in Mike's house we do not have). What I didn't "know-know" was whether or not I was going to go - like I told Seth, I'll travel to wherever I have to go to get to my people. I'll travel through galaxies - whatever it takes to do what I came here to do. I'm not wasting any more of my precious earth time waiting for anybody else to get their shit together. I'm ready to roll!

Well, after that conversation we got on track pretty damn fast. We did it. We signed the contract April 5th - just in time. We move in on the next New Moon, April 26th.

Here's our home!

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Continuing to align - clearing out the basement

After many great and sometimes difficult conversations with Seth + a noticeable shift in him, I chose to proceed with this path with him. When we are on, it's on. In the same breath, when we get derailed, it happens fast and furious. It makes me apprehensive while also, I know that we need to allow ourselves the opportunity to grow as a couple, without me freaking out and running away. Without him freaking out and burning shit to the ground. Seth is important to me, and he has been on my mind for the entire length of my life since I met him. I want to give this a chance while at the same time being careful not to sacrifice the aspects of me that I have discovered and adore.

So, in light of moving forward - we proceeded with the credit check on the day before his birthday. It turns out that he got approved for $2500 rent payment even without any credit. And I have a credit score of 706! Of course we were excited and he was noticeably relieved. I wondered if this wasn't the bulk of his stress.

On Monday of this week the kids and I went on a bike ride to Burger King. When we got home, Mike asked us to put our bikes in the side yard, which of course is full of nails, and his energy was all out of wack. I was immediately chagrined and started pulling up houses to look at. I found a place posted on CraigsList who's titled showed "Townhouse in Meadow like setting" I pulled it up and knew instantly that we had to go look at it.

OMG I'm sitting here typing and just now realized that on the morning that I found the house, we had sex. Seth came, I did not. The sex was great, but because I haven't cum with him in about 2 months - I was pissed, sad. I went out and sat on the earth - which felt phenomenal - and cried and got over it. Then I worked all day. The night before we had a phenomenal conversation outside and loved loved loved on each other.

I'm not feeling great about myself right now. What is my problem?

The house is so great! I need to move in like now. I need to get my head in the game and leave all the lower emotions and vibrations behind when we enter our new home.

I have fluctuating emotions and feelings. The biggest one happening lately is my worth or rather the lack thereof. It's not right. I go way down and way out of reality. The difference now is, that when this happens, I have been remembering to bring in light. Recognizing it as an opportunity for healing those aspects of myself.

I just went back to the bedroom, worked with my crystal. Then told him I need to have sex with him. We did. I came. But holy freaking hell ~ getting to the point where I allowed the release and the letting go of feeling like I am unattractive, unloved, unwanted - to saying what I need, and allowing him to give it to me. Alright - there you go, the joys of going down - cleaning out the left over gunk from many lifetimes - and bringing St. Germaines purple flame to clear out the shame - so that I can continue and get to the life that I know exists in a parallel universe for me.