Good morning!

I'm wondering how I can build a sustainable, loving relationship with my hubby. Here's how our days look right now. The kids wake us up. Shanon or I make the coffee, listen to the mumbles and grumbles of everyone squirming out of bed...except Bailey. She loves the mornings, she sings and screams her morning songs - it's my favorite. That, and coffee. If there is no coffee to look forward to, I have a hard time wanting to move at all. Laying there after being nursed on all night makes me want to squeeze my eyes shut just a few seconds more. Unless there is coffee, with cream and agave nectar of course.
Next Shanon gets on the computer to check stuff. Facebook, the chicken forum, ect. ect. Shanon or I make breakfast for the kids, which lately includes cold cereal. Then Colton is off to school and Alex gets to wash the morning dishes. Mostly a challenge. I mean it's fun playing in the water. Not washing the dishes, but playing in the water. It may take the next thirty minutes for him to get the dishes done. Bailey and I go to work at the B&B. Shanon gets Alex out the door, to the bus stop and he is at work by 7:30.
Bai is great at the B&B again, a morning person by trade she sings and screams until everyone is awake and telling her what a great baby she is. Smiling at her while she pretends to be shy and blush away. She loves talking with people as I cook breakfast and serve the coffee. It's good for her. I get as much as I can done before she needs me again, which ironically is right around the same time that everyone is ready to eat. If I can get everyone served within fifteen minutes it's wonderful. Things usually work out perfect timing there. I love the variety of guests that come through. And I love that they all eventually leave to. It gives me the spice I need in my life. Most of the guests are couples. I get to see how they interact with each other and I aspire for what I want in my relationship at home. I ask questions, and listen attentively to their responses. Imagining what it's like in other people's lives. This job is probably really good for me too.
After the rooms are clean we head home to attend to our home. Laundry, any remaining dishes, eat lunch, decide what's for dinner, change the diaper, nurse, go to the grocery store, lay down for an afternoon nap, that sort of thing.
Colton is the first to get home at 3 p.m. Then Shanon at 3:30. Alex around 3:45. If there is time, and the weather permitting, we will go out to the garden and water the plants, turn on the water for the lawn.
Shanon will get on the computer to check the regulars. He thinks I'm jealous of his friends and of his computer time. But really I just want to spend time with him. It seems we could be closer. I know we have three kids, and they all have needs and I do to. I don't feel like I nag. It seems to me with all the guests that I've seen come through that it would be possible to feel a deeper connection. I know there are 'those' that don't. I don't want to be a 'those'. Is that wrong?
I'll make dinner around 5 and we eat around 6. Movie after that. Then bed.
Pretty standard really.
I know I have a really great life. Finally some established roots. Feels awesome. There is a flower that wants to bloom but I don't know what kind of nourishment it needs to flourish. I'm not giving it what it needs. I hope the knowledge comes to me soon, I would love to get started right away.